rowanberries | (no subject)

Look, I don't even know why this is still going.

Torchwood and related concepts/characters? Not mine.
Money? None.
MPreg, Amy? Well, it wasn't my idea.

Followon from this, this and this.

"Jack?"

"...bye baby, baby... Gwen."

"I was wondering. Have you thought of any names?"

"...Names."

"Well, you know. One time Rhys and I were a bit drunk, we got to making a list. He did girls names, I did boys names, it was... nice. Might help you!"

"Isn't it usually the other way around? You know, Man does boys, Woman does girls? Figuratively speaking, obviously."

"We thought it would help impartiality, like. I rather liked Peter and Aidan for a little boy, and Rhys chose Kailyn, or Rhiannon or Janie for a girl."

"Uh-huh. What about neuter?"

"Sorry?"

"Gwen, it's entirely likely that the... baby, for lack of a better word, will have no gender as we know it on this planet. For all we know, it might have inherited the tendancy to a spiked tail and multicoloured pus-filled blisters on the spine. It's like a lottery of physical traits just waiting for labour day, a day that I am not looking forward to, by the way."

"Well, there's always names that could be either."

"...Huh?"

"You know, Ashley, or Rowan, or even Evelyn, that was originally for both boys and girls..."

"I'm adding your name to my hit list, right under Owen's."

"Oh, come on, Jack, I know you don't mean that. I'm helping! How about Jay, or Dorian?"

"Ianto! Ianto! Kill!"

"Sir, you know my policy on contracted killings. I see no wood oven installed, or even a new bean grinder."

"...Maybe Lee... or Elliot is nice, too."

"I hate you all."

"Yes, Sir, of course. Does that mean I can go home tonight?"

"...Oh, god, don't leave me."

"Yes, Sir."