rowanberries | (no subject)

Look, I don't even know why this is still going.

Torchwood and related concepts/characters? Not mine.
Money? None.
MPreg, Amy? Well, it wasn't my idea.

Followon from this, this and this.

"Jack?"

"...bye baby, baby... Gwen."

"I was wondering. Have you thought of any names?"

"...Names."

"Well, you know. One time Rhys and I were a bit drunk, we got to making a list. He did girls names, I did boys names, it was... nice. Might help you!"

"Isn't it usually the other way around? You know, Man does boys, Woman does girls? Figuratively speaking, obviously."

"We thought it would help impartiality, like. I rather liked Peter and Aidan for a little boy, and Rhys chose Kailyn, or Rhiannon or Janie for a girl."

"Uh-huh. What about neuter?"

"Sorry?"

"Gwen, it's entirely likely that the... baby, for lack of a better word, will have no gender as we know it on this planet. For all we know, it might have inherited the tendancy to a spiked tail and multicoloured pus-filled blisters on the spine. It's like a lottery of physical traits just waiting for labour day, a day that I am not looking forward to, by the way."

"Well, there's always names that could be either."

"...Huh?"

"You know, Ashley, or Rowan, or even Evelyn, that was originally for both boys and girls..."

"I'm adding your name to my hit list, right under Owen's."

"Oh, come on, Jack, I know you don't mean that. I'm helping! How about Jay, or Dorian?"

"Ianto! Ianto! Kill!"

"Sir, you know my policy on contracted killings. I see no wood oven installed, or even a new bean grinder."

"...Maybe Lee... or Elliot is nice, too."

"I hate you all."

"Yes, Sir, of course. Does that mean I can go home tonight?"

"...Oh, god, don't leave me."

"Yes, Sir."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

First: ahh, I thought the other one was the last one, obviously. (Too many tabs.)

Seoncd, it still stands: More please? And of course Ianto wants a bean grinder in exchange--what kind of king of coffee would he be otherwise?

Poor pregnant Jack. *pets him*

*Headdesk*

First: I am never averse to extra comments on my crazed ficlets. >_> It helps the morning after 'what was I thinking?' part!

Oh, poor Jack. I can't actually figure out whether it would be kinder or crueller for the Junior!Jack to die or survive. Augh...

And Ianto... I gather that he's been very supportive, enough that he totally deserves a new bean grinder, and definitely his own roasting oven.

That depends on the overall tone you want to go for, really, crack!fic or sad!fic.

Oo, a roasting oven . . .

Oh, crack.

It has to be crack.

Angst!MPreg is just worrying...

Hmm...then I say Jack Junior survives, and goes on to start his own coffee company thanks to his Uncle Ianto's expert tutelage.

And wins over skeptics with his... unusual powers of persuasion!

Meanwhile, MommyDaddy Jack just gives up on his teetotal lifestyle.

MommyDaddy! Hee.

And somehow nobody ever remarks on Jack Junior's unusual physiology . . . again, that power of persuasion.

*cracks up* Oh, Amy, I love you.

DID I MENTION RECENTLY THAT I FUCKING LOVE YOU?

*bursts out laughing*
Pure brillance!
Glad its been unlocked ^^ Love it!